And now for something completely different! This is an Oldhammer battle report that is inspired by Steve Jackson's Ogre boardgame. For those who dont know Ogre, its about a giant cybernetic tank (the Ogre) that is trying to destroy an enemy HQ defended by a horde of infantry, tanks, missile tanks, artillery, and hovercraft. I played the heck out of the mini pocket game when I was a kid. The basic game was pretty much just a single scenario that my pals and I played over and over again. Everyone had their own strategy and theory of how best to play as or against the Ogre and many a lunch break was occupied with heated discussion over tactics. Playing as the Ogre tank, felt like the 4th of July, in that you had all these weapons and you got to decide which one to light and fire off next. As the defenders, you had all these cannon fodder units, and if you actually damaged the Ogre you had to decide whether you targeted its weapons (to lessen the deathtoll to your troops) or its treads (and slow the Ogre down so it didnt get in firing range of your HQ).
In tribute to this great little game, I present this battle report inspired by Ogre. Obviously, no... there is no giant tank in Moria. But what will represent the Ogre? An Ogre? A Dragon? Balrog? Something else?
Can you guess what it will be? I will try to drop a hint or two below. Place your bets here folks...
Onwards to the fluff...
The Wraith looks upset, his commanders avoid looking him IN THE EYE... Sockets that is.
There is an invisible forcefield that prevents them from getting to the bridge. They hear the Dwarves cheering from the other side.
Cheery Dwarf: (blows raspsberries) You cannot passsss!
Stilts: Thats some good "Ent"-tertainment! (Crowd Boos!)
Murkillor: (gives the silly Dwarves an evil EYE) Drow open fire at your convenience.
Cheery: Hey Sleepy! Wake up and run for your narcoleptic life!
Murkillor: Well, I guess you Orcs and Drow have to go ahead without us.
Lord Commander Alric: There wont be enough of us to take that fortress.
Gragg: We Orcs are not afraid! We will go, even if the Elves will not!
Murkillor: Lady Alyza, perhaps your Dragons can fly over and knock out their Rune Totem?
Lady Alyza: Ive only got 6, and 2 of them have no wings. SEE, that one is a basilisk, and the other one there is a hydra.
Murkillor: Well, how about...
Murkillor: That... is... wonderful! Wherever did you get him?
Lady Alyza: Found him left for dead in a ravine. Seems he got in a tussle with those very same Dwarves across the bridge. (points to the Dwarves)
Lady Alyza: Apparently, all this poor Beholder wanted was some beer to quench his firey thirst after being a participant in the famous Middle Earth eating contest "Radagast's Rhosgobel Annual Hellpepper Showdown". Instead of helping out, the Dwarves chose to stab him with spears and throw him over a cliff. Rude... if you ask me...
(From the post "Tale of the Evil Eye" here: http://mars-miniatures.blogspot.com/2015/05/heartbreaker-dwarves-tale-of-evil-eye.html)
Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul, ash nazg thrakatulûk agh burzum-ishi krimpatul!
Murkillor: Nearly finished....
Alyza: YOU.... turned him into a Frost Beholder. Brilliant!
Alyza: (holds up a mirror) You look good, Beholdy!
Beholder: Grrr..... (Anxious to show those no good Dwarves what it can do)
Class? Anyone? Anyone? Anyone seen this before? The Laffer Curve. Anyone know what this says?
Its Ferris Bueller, c'mon... its funny. No?
Well, anyway, pat yourselves on the back and buy yourselves a pint of Bugmans Brew, if you did guess it...
Here's the reward for all those who guessed correctly. Cash in your prize by high fiving the Displacer Cat's paw on the image below...
So what does the Beholder do in game terms?
Well, its a flying creature, is lawful evil, has darkvision 360 degrees so it may target enemies with eye powers even in total darkness.
Frost Beholder Move 6, WS 7, BS 4, S 5, T E, W see below, I 5, Attacks 3
Beholder has 12 hitpoints on its carapace. For every 2 full wounds taken there, it loses 1" of movement. Each eye has 1 hitpoint, except its main eye which has 3 points. So it has a total of 24 hitpoints. An attacker may choose which area to hit. To kill it, it must lose all 12 hitpoints on its carapace, and all hitpoints on its eyes.
Beholder Powers, these powers may be used during the magic phase, and may target models in base to base contact with beholder. Each eye has a points cost to power it, and the Beholder may use as many eyes as it has points to use. But each eye can only be used once per turn. Beholder has a starting power points stat of 6, use a d6
end of every turn to regains d3 points. It may never have more than 6 power points at any time.
Freeze ray, this costs 3 points, it uses flamer template that can shoot out to a distance of 12". Everyone under the template is frozen. Armor can help you from freezing, all affected models may make an armor save to avoid being frozen to death, if model has no armor save, they get a 6+.
Minor eyes: each power can only be used once per turn and costs 1 point each.
1) Fear, a single model must take a morale check with a -2 modifier, if it fails it is routed (or retreats for 2 turns, as per the chart). 18" range
2) Charm Person, a single model must take a morale check, if it fails it may make an immediate move in any direction Beholder decides, it may even charge and make an attack against its own friendly units. It is free of charm at the end of beholders turn. 12" range
3) Telekinetic Blast, use small round template with a range of 12". All units under template are moved directly away 2d6 inches. If they come into contact with terrain, every model takes a single Str3 hit. If they contact other models, all models involved take a single Str 3 hit.
4) Death Ray, use flame template with short end touching Beholder and facing any direction. Any figure under it must save vs death or suffer instant death. To save vs Death, make a d6 roll under or equal to figure's Strength.
5) Disintegrate, 24" range. A single model must save vs Disintegrate or suffer instant death. To save vs Disintegrate, make a d6 roll under or equal to figure's Strength.
6) Slow, 12" range. A single target unit or character loses half its movement next turn and may not charge. It may still move during reserve movement, but at half speed. If used on a unit, it affects d6+2 figures.
7) Sleep, 12" range. A single unit or character must save vs Sleep or lose its next turn. To save vs Sleep, make a d6 roll under or equal to the figure's Initiative.
8) Paralyze, 6" range. A single model is paralyzed and may not move for rest of game, unless a heal spell is cast on it.
9) Turn To Stone, 6" range. A single model is turned to stone and is considered dead. To save vs Turn to Stone, make a d6 roll under or equal to the figure's Strength.
I have no idea how under or over powered this monstrosity is. Lets just throw it into combat!
Next post: Steve Jackson's Ogre Vs Oldhammer Part 2 - Prepare For Ground Assault!