Dark Forces in the Old Forest

In the Old Forest, on a dark cloudy day, dark figures meet for some dark purpose...

By the last breath of the fourth winds blow
Better raise your ears
The sound of hooves knock at your door
Lock up your wife and children now
It's time to wield the blade
For now you have got some company

The Horsemen are drawing nearer
On leather steeds they ride
They've come to take your life
On through the dead of night
With the Four Horsemen ride
Or choose your fate and die

Oh YEAH YEAH...

Wraith Raccoon: You underestimate the power of the Dark Side. If you will not fight, then you will meet your destiny!

Snarktail: I am now one of the Dark Overlords of the Universe.

Gravelord Nito: Ever danced with the Devil by the pale moonlight?

Swamp Groot:  There was no alien. The flash of light you saw in the sky was not a UFO. Swamp gas from a weather balloon was trapped in a thermal pocket and reflected the light from Venus.

Everyone: ... (turning to look at Swamp Groot)

Swamp Groot:  errr....  I am Swamp Groot?

Shelob:  (dropping down from out of nowhere) Hey guys!

Everyone:  Hey Shelob!

Shelob:  Movie quote game?  I sure do like playing games!  

Snarktail:  Yeah, Sauron is always saying that you play with your food alot.

Shelob:  I heard about this Shire place you guys are going to.  Can I come with?

Snarktail:  Of course you can! 

Shelob: Thanks little buddy!  Im sorry I ate your cousin.  Good food is hard to come by in Cirith Ungol.

Snarktail:  No problem. And, ummm, you ate 7 of my cousins actually...

Shelob:  Awkward...

Wraith Raccoon:  Hey Shelob, you got room in the back?  My feet hurt from all this walking around.  

Shelob: Of course!  Hop in.

Wraith Raccoon:  Eat your heart out, Gravelord Nito!  My ride is extra wide! And tall!  I can see forever from up here!  All right you villains, lets get this party started!  Those Hobbits arent going to eat themselves.  Scouts, patrol up ahead!  The rest of you line up behind the Big Spider.

The caravan of evil travels for hours through the Old Forest until Swamp Groot and the Wolf Scouts come across a wall.

Wraith Raccoon:  Are we there yet?   Anyone know where we are?

Snarktail:  This wall is called "The Hedge".  It is the boundary between the Old Forest and the Shire.  We have just entered Buckland. 

Snarktail:  All righty.  Im guessing that General Remulak and General Roborr have crushed Longbottom.  So lets head southwest to try and get together with them.

Shelob:  Any Hobbit towns nearby where we can refuel?  Im kinda hungry, and some of you Gobbos are beginning to look tasty.

Snarktail:  Oooh, um, theres some small towns around here that are easy pickin's.

Wraith Raccoon:  I hear these Hobbits are Halflings.  And Halflings are allies of the Empire.  Stirland Moot or Shire, I dont care what they call it.  The Empire must pay for their atrocities!  Prepare to die, filthy little Hobbits!

~~~

Ok so there's a nice fluffy post.
Its the calm before the storm.  And that storm you feel... is battle!

Exciting times in the Shire!
Stay tuned, true Raccoon believers.

Oh, so I know this week has had a post everyday.  When it rains it pours on this blog.
The next post should be Monday.  And its definitely going to be a multi part AAR.
Yup, this weekend will be filled with battle and I will be sure to document all of it.
So, its going to get busy again with posts next week with a very different type of battle report.
Not Willowbottom just yet.  (Indeed, the Dwarves have decided to defend Willowbottom and let Tuckborough, Hobbiton and the whole West Farthing fall to the Greenskin invaders.  Sucks, but they just had to make sure Lady Mormont was able to join up with them.)
This weekends battle will involve the Beer Cart!
So prepare to yell the proper call and response... Mhinz Abeir! Zyor Rond!

Cheers,
Mar

Next Post:  Tales From The Beer Cart