Thursday, July 27, 2023

Hasslefree Dwarves Return!

 The Dwarves have returned to Middle Earth. 

They intend to retake Moria once again against seemingly insurmountable odds.

Since the reboot of this blog, Ive tried to only use minis with the realistic 28mm proportions (Darksword, Perry). I needed Dwarves that would fit in. So, here we have Kev White minis from Hasslefree Miniatures! Oh, actually they have been in this blog before and had a few battles under their belt before they were sold in an earlier purge. So while the models themselves were recently purchased and painted, from a fluff point of view, they have "returned".

Clan Hasslefree in all their glory!

The old fluff on our blog didnt put names to these Dwarves, so with this post, we will remedy this injustice and name the champions.

Left to Right: King Gourd, Balzac the Armorer

King Gourd has a Frostfang. A powerful runesword that negates enemy To-Save. Enemies beware!

A gourd is a pumpkin or a squash. So "out of his gourd" would mean... he's crazy because he misplaced his squash?

Balzac the Armorer: This is the way.

Left ot Right: Strummer the Slayer, Princess Inga, Brock the Brewmaster

Strummer the Slayer got all lost in the supermarket and could no longer shop happily. Princess Inga is the daughter of King Gourd. Brock the Brewmaster swore an Oath of Mug Holding and has been holding that mug for years, even in the midst of battle!

Left to Right: Lumpy the Librarian, Thimbold the Grey, Phoebe priestess of Valaya

Lumpy carries the history of Clan Hasslefree and has several Books of Grudges. Thimbold is another Grey Wizard in a long line of Grey Wizards. Phoebe is the priestess of Valaya the Dwarven goddess of Protection.

The royal family. Like father, like daughter, they do love to brandish their weapons up high. And probably reciting an ancient grudge or two.

Brock the Brewmaster is reunited with Butters the Beer Cart Pony.  Brock gives Butters a sugarcube for a treat. There, there, now. Good boy, Butters.

It is told that in their beginning the Dwarves were made by Aule in the darkness of Middle-earth; for so greatly did Aule desire the coming of the Children, to have learners to whom he could teach his lore and his crafts, that he was unwilling to await the fulfilment of the designs of Iluvatar. And Aule made the Dwarves even as they still are, because the forms of the Children who were to come were unclear to his mind, and because the power of Melkor was yet over the Earth; and he wished therefore that they should be strong and unyielding. But fearing that the other Valar might blame his work, he wrought in secret: and he made first the Seven Fathers of the Dwarves in a hall under the mountains in Middle-earth.

Now Iluvatar knew what was done, and in the very hour that Aule's work was complete, and he was pleased, and began to instruct the Dwarves in the speech that he had devised for them, Iluvatar spoke to him; and Aule heard his voice and was silent. And the voice of Iluvatar said to him: 'Why hast thou done this? Why dost thou attempt a thing which thou knowest is beyond thy power and thy authority? For thou hast from me as a gift thy own bring only, and no more; and therefore the creatures of thy hand and mind can live only by that being, moving when thou thinkest to move them, and if thy thought be elsewhere, standing idle. Is that thy desire?'

Then Aule answered: 'I did not desire such lordship. I desired things other than I am, to love and to teach them, so that they too might perceive the beauty of Ea, which thou hast caused to be. For it seemed to me that there is great room in Arda for many things that might rejoice in it, yet it is for the most part empty still, and dumb. And in my impatience I have fallen into folly. Yet the making of thing is in my heart from my own making by thee; and the child of little understanding that makes a play of the deeds of his father may do so without thought of mockery, but because he is the son of his father. But what shall I do now, so that thou be not angry with me for ever? As a child to his father, I offer to thee these things, the work of the hands which thou hast made. Do with them what thou wilt. But should I not rather destroy the work of my presumption?'

Then Aule took up a great hammer to smite the Dwarves; and he wept. But Iluvatar had compassion upon Aule and his desire, because of his humility; and the Dwarves shrank from the hammer and wore afraid, and they bowed down their heads and begged for mercy. And the voice of Iluvatar said to Aule: 'Thy offer I accepted even as it was made. Dost thou not see that these things have now a life of their own, and speak with their own voices? Else they would not have flinched from thy blow, nor from any command of thy will.' Then Aule cast down his hammer and was glad, and he gave thanks to Iluvatar, saying: 'May Eru bless my work and amend it!'

But Iluvatar spoke again and said: 'Even as I gave being to the thoughts of the Ainur at the beginning of the World, so now I have taken up thy desire and given to it a place therein; but in no other way will I amend thy handiwork, and as thou hast made it, so shall it be. But I will not suffer this: that these should come before the Firstborn of my design, nor that thy impatience should be rewarded. They shall sleep now in the darkness under stone, and shall not come forth until the Firstborn have awakened upon Earth; and until that time thou and they shall wait, though long it seem. But when the time comes I will awaken them, and they shall be to thee as children; and often strife shall arise between thine and mine, the children of my adoption and the children of my choice.'


Since they were to come in the days of the power of Melkor, Aule made the Dwarves strong to endure.

Therefore they are stone-hard, stubborn, fast in friendship and in enmity, and they suffer toil and hanger and hurt of body more hardily than all other speaking peoples; and they live long, far beyond the span of Men, yet not for ever.

Aforetime it was held among the Elves in Middle-earth that dying the Dwarves returned to the earth and the stone of which they were made; yet that is not their own belief. For they say that Aule the Maker, whom they call Mahal, cares for them, and gathers them to Mandos in halls set apart; and that he declared to their Fathers of old that Iluvatar will hallow them and give them a place among the Children in the End. Then their part shall be to serve Aule and to aid him in the remaking of Arda after the Last Battle. They say also that the Seven Fathers of the Dwarves return to live again in their own kin and to bear once more their ancient names: of whom Durin was the most renowned in after ages, father of that kindred most friendly to the Elves, whose mansions were at Khazad-dum.

~~~


Id forgotten the biblical tone that the Silmarillion was written in. And Im glad to be reminded of the reason there is enmity between Dwarves and Elves. Its not personal, its in their creation.Those hoity-toity elves thought they were the first born. Nope, technically you were 2nd born, my long eared buddies...

Cheers,

Mar


Sunday, July 16, 2023

The Battle of Zirakzigil, Part 3

 The conclusion of the Battle of Zirakzigil...

The Beercart Pony trudges on! Get that Beercart movin! Butters the Beercart Pony nods and snorts. Lets get this caravan rollin!

Keep rollin', rollin', rollin'
Though the streams are swollen
Keep them dawwgies rollin', Rawhide!
Through rain and wind and weather
Hell-bent for leather

Move 'em on, head 'em up, head 'em up, move 'em on
Move 'em on, head 'em up, Rawhide!
Cut 'em out, ride 'em in, ride 'em in, cut 'em out
Cut 'em out, ride 'em in, Rawhide!

Goldberry faces the angry Wyvern! What can one Goldberry do against such reckless hate?

The Hobbits unleash another salvo of rocks and everything misses. Alpha uses another Disintegrate Bolt and wounds the Wyvern again! But now, the Wyvern looks even angrier! Xanthia fires off another Ice Blast and miscasts.

Xanthia: Oh no, sorry Goldberry. You are on your own now. I cant watch whatever process is about to happen.

So it comes down to Goldberry herself. If she wants to survive this, she better take control of her destiny!

Goldberry casts her Banish spell... and succeeds! The Wyvern squawks and reels away flying off for a turn. Another turn that Goldberry survives. Everyone breathes a sigh of relief.

Goldberry: In spite of it all, I gotta admit, Wyverns have a sweet dino-bird song and they do have lovely plummage!

Xanthia: Its a grating sound they squawk. And it has no feathers to be considered plummage... its like Nazgul Fell Beast leather rotting batwings.

As if a Wyvern was not enough to contend with... another monstrosity appears swooping into Goldberry and friends area.

Alpha: Hostile airspace is hot, today! Hobbits arm yourselves@!

Hobbit Militia: Sir, yes, sir!

Verbal, Zoltar, and Bortai watch a strange creature floating/swimming towards them.

Verbal: It looks fascinating. Kinda like a sky whale of some sort. Maybe its friendly?

Zoltar: I got 100 gold pieces that says it aint friendly!

Zoltar: Its a Manta Mind Enslaver! If it gets close it can take control of our minds!

And another monster appears! Its a Nightmare. Or should we say a Night Mare? And its coming along like a horse on fire! But from which direction?

Sir Solaire: Its a fire-horse! A sign from the Sun Gods! Awww... we cant just shoot it.

Imperial Handgunners: They shoot horses dont they?

The mere proximity of the approaching Nightmare sends waves of heat in an aura and one of the Handgunners spontaneously combusts!

Sir Solaire: Oh never mind! Kill that fire-horse now! Before we all suffer heat stroke!

And near the Occulum, two terrifying beings speak in hushed tones. One is a vulture-like Demon Lord of Tzeentch and the other is an avatar of Dagon the Fish God.

DemonLord Skeksos: OK, you go around that way and I will go this way. Slay the Pony-ling! It must not reach the Occulum! Got it?

Avatar of Dagon: Glub glub!

But the Beercart Pony gallops full speed between the fish creature and the vulture creature!

Lord Skeksos: Stay! No! Stay... Stay... *motions to self* friend. Stay, am friend. Prophecy, prophecy cause all this trouble. Show Skeksos you want peace.

Goldberry: Dont listen to him, Butters. Its a trick!

Lord Skekos: Wait! Please! Please make peace! Please!

And the Beercart arrives at the destination!
But um... what now?

Butters the Pony looks around nervously, wasnt someone supposed to unload the Beer or something? Im just a pony. I dont have hands. I have hooves. I pull the cart, thats my job, Im a beercart pony not a beercart unloader...

But suddenly the Occulum gives off a low humming sound.  It is powering up anyway, the mere presence of the power of Bugmans Brew is enough to charge it up!

A red glow begins to emanate from within the crystal.

Suns, moons, stars.
Yes, the angle of eternity.
Thats how I know its coming.
The Great Conjunction!

Suddenly all lights dim and everyone stops fighting and looks towards the Occulum...

I don't know what to do
I'm always in the dark
Living in a powder keg and giving off sparks
I really need you tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight
(Forever's gonna start tonight)

Disembodied voice: We leave you the Crystal of Truth. Make your world in its light.

When single shines the triple sun
What was sundered and undone
Shall be whole, the two made one

The Dagon avatar screams in silent fury! Next time, pony! I will get you next time!

Butters lives to deliver beer another day!

And all the monsters flee from the light! The day is won and the game is over.

Zoltar: I knew it! I knew we would win this one! They all predicted a TPK, but I never doubted for a second!

Goldberry: So, Bullywug King. The lights are pretty and all, but... what was this all for?

Bullywug King: Concentrate... feel the Force flow. Yes. Good. Calm, yes. Through the Force, things you will see. Other places. The future. The past. Old friends long gone.

And everyone backs away from the Beacon. Something is happening. Some great celestial event. It truly is the Great Conjunction! A gate between dimenions opens up and...

...the veil between worlds are torn asunder as the rift widens. Short stocky silhouettes come marching out. With great big bushy beards, an axe in one hand and a tankard of beer in the other, squat beings squint at the brightness of the world of Middle Earth.

A voice booms out among them: Who summons the Dwarves of the Void? Who disturbs our Great Eternal Slumber?

Bullywug King: Brave Sons of Durin! You all once swore an oath to keep your word, to uphold justice, and to be loyal in friendship. Middle Earth requires your duty and service once again. What say you? For Oath and Beer?

Someone yells: Mhinz Abeir?

The rest yell: Zyor Rond! *cheering* 


And just like that, after two long ages, the Dwarves of Moria have returned! Baruk Khazâd! Khazâd ai-mênu!

~~~


And there is the Battle of Zirakzigil.

Moria is a state of mind...

There is a certain something that keeps me returning to this blog. The painting, gaming, storytelling? Its not one of those things in particular. Is it the trope of Dwarves? Something about them - finding a home in their world. Maybe. But its just a fantasy. Still, that doesnt discount it less. Does their journey mirror my own. Smarter minds than mine would know. And its probably best summarized with these two songs. One was used in the movie Brazil, perhaps one my favorite movies. And the other covered by This Mortal Coil perhaps one of my favorite music collaborations. So I leave these lyrics here at the end of this post...

 

 

WITH TOMORROW

It was more like a dream than realityI must have thought it was a dream while you were here with meWhen you were near I didn't think you would leaveWhen you were gone it was too much to believe
So with tomorrow, I will borrowAnother moment of joy and sorrowIn another dream, and anotherWith tomorrow
 
So with the sun there won't be time just to look behindThere won't be reasons, no descriptions for my place in mindThere was so much I was told, it was not realSo many things that I could not tasteBut I could feel
So with tomorrow, I will borrowAnother moment of joy and sorrowIn another dream, and anotherWith tomorrow
 
 
 
 
AQUARELA DO BRAZIL

Then, tomorrow was another day
the morning found me miles away
with still a million things to say...

Now, as twilight dims the sky above
recalling thrills of our love
there's one thing Im certain of...
Return, I will to old...
Brazil.




Cheers my friends and return we will to Old Moria,

Mar




The Battle of Zirakzigil, Part 2

The Battle of Zirakzigil continues...

 

The Gug is approaching and fast. Bortai fires a volley of quick shots at it but the arrows bounce off the Gugs' armor-like skin. Verbal chooses to use his crossbow to punch through the Gugs' hide and it pays off as its -2 To-Hit modifier wounds the Gug. But still the Gug bounds forwards towards the heroes.

Two more Gugs come into view, roaring their bestial roars.

Sir Solaire commands his men to set spears. Behind them, the Handgunners load their muskets. They stand on higher ground than Sir Solaire and the Spearmen and will be able to fire over them.

Ready, aim... volley!

Clouds of smoke cover the field and the Gugs are lost to view. Did they survive that tremendous blast of firepower?

The Gugs leap out of the fog and although wounded, they charge at our heroes.

The Gugs tower over the battle lines, as the spearmen jab at them. The Handgunners begin to reload.

Reload!

One Gug charges at Sir Solaire as he is reciting his incantation to cause his sword to burst into deadly flames.

Sir Solaire: *ignites his sword* For the Night is dark and full of terrors...

The other Gug looks to eat a spearman.

Hold! Hold the Line! Hold!

And Sir Solaire uses his fiery lightsaber to slay the Gug to the cheers of his men!

Sir Solaire: As the Lord of Light says, death by Fire is the purest death.

To the north, Zoltar the Enchanter casts Vorpal Bunny and succeeds his To-Cast roll. The Bunny leaps at the Gug and tears through its chest. That rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide, its a killer! Look at the bones!

Kano breathes a sigh of relief as the Gug crashes into the ground and skids to a halt, right in front of him.

Goldberry and the Beercart make haste towards the Occulum. The Beercart Pony keeps pace. Such a brave pony!

Alpha: Listen! Something. Something up ahead!

Xanthia: Protect the Beercart!

Hobbit Militia: Aye, aye, sir! Ummm.. Ma'am.

A Wyvern descends upon Goldberry who positions herself between it and the beercart. Butters the Beercart Pony understands its assignment and goes around to continue on its way.

A Wyvern has a whopping 12 points of Health, can make 2 claw attacks, and 1 very deadly stinger attack.

Goldberry: Go on, Butters! I will hold this beast off as long as I can!

Alpha: Ok Hobbits... form firing line! And... volley fire!

The Hobbits move into position and let loose with their slings. Incredibly, they hit the Wyvern! Twice! The Hobbits cheer for joy!

But their joyful shrieks turn to snorts and grunts as the stone projectiles bounce off the Wyvern's thick hide.

Alpha uses a Disintegration Bolt with his Crossbow and it does not bounce off the Wyvern's hide! It causes two wounds on the beastie!


 But still the Wyvern can cause an incredible amount of damage on Goldberry. Probably kill her outright. So, its up to Xanthia the Ice Witch.

Xanthia: *casting spell* Knick knack paddy whack!

And it succeeds! Xanthia's Ice Blast spell has not only wounded the Wyvern again, but has frozen it for a turn! Goldberry will live (at least for another turn).

The Hobbits cheer! Things sure are looking up! But the game isnt over yet little halflings...

~~~

Next Post: The conclusion to the Battle of Zirakzigil!

 

 

 

 

The Battle of Zirakzigil, Part 1

 Welcome to the Battle of Zirakzigil!

 

Left to Right: Goldberry, Zoltar, Xanthia, Sir Solaire, Bulldog, Kano, Alpha, Verbal, Bortai, Stroika

We start with the same pic that ended last post, but this time... with different words!

Goldberry:  All right, sweethearts, you're a team and there's nothin' to worry about. We come here, and we gonna conquer, and we gonna kick some, is that understood? That's what we gonna do, sweethearts, we are going to go and get some. All right, people, on the ready line! Are ya lean?

Heroes: Yeah!

Goldberry: Are ya mean?

Heroes: Yeah!

Goldberry: WHAT ARE YOU?

Heroes: Lean and mean!

Goldberry: Get on the ready line! Marines, get some today! Get on the ready line! Move it out! Move it out, goddammit! Get hot! One, two, three, four! Get out, get out, get out! Move it out, move it out, move it out! Move it out, move it out, move it out! One, two, three, four, five, six, seven! Aaarrrrr, absolutely badassess! Let's pack 'em in! Get in there!

Zoltar: Um boss? I think we are close to the summit, its just around the corner. Im not picking up anything on the motion tracker. Oh wait... we got a strong signal there. Right ahead. Whatever it is, its sitting right at our objective. Right on the beacon that the White Tower has sent us to investigate.

Goldberry: Someone check on our little army behind us, make sure they know its game time!

Left to Right: Butters the Beercart Pony, Hobbit Militia, Gondorian Imperial Handgunners, Dol Amroth Myrmidon Spearmen

Butters the Beercart Pony gives a wistful neigh. The Hobbits huddle around the Beercart. They know what the most important mission is... save the Beercart at all costs!

 
Up ahead they see the Beacon, a small ziggurat-like formation of stones with a mystical looking pedestal on the top. Surrounding it are four stone megaliths with unlit lamps.

Even further away they see a ruins and at the furthest end - a Numinous Occulum. A structure that some unknown and ancient civilization built for looking and perhaps communicating with other dimensions. There appears to be some sort of dark crystal built into the round observatory part on its upper floor.

A view of the full length of the table.

The heroes and their entourage approach the beacon and a Slann Mage on his floating stone throne greets them.

Bullywug King: Hail, brave heroes! All of this has happened before. All of this will happen again.

Heroes: So say we all.

Bullywug King: I am the Lizard King. I can do anything! But not this time... I need your help to stop Mythos from destroying our world! Our salvation lies there... *points at the Beercart*

Butters the Beercart Pony: *neighs*

The Bullywug King explains that the Beer Cart must be taken to the nearby Numinous Occulum, to power up the Beacon using Bugman's Beer as a fuel source. With that done, the Bullywug King can send an amplified summons for help to otherworldly allies. The Bullywug King must stay near the Beacon to cast his spell, while the Beer Cart and its defenders must reach the Occulum.

Goldberry: Ooh, I just know that something good is gonna happen. I don't know when but just saying it could even make it happen.

Zoltar: Simmer down, compadre... So, um... Lizard Dude... what happens if we cant get the Beercart to this... Occulum?

Bullywug King: Then you better have a bigger army than the one with you because if I know Nyarlathotep, he has sent his minions here to destroy us all completely. *suddenly bestial roars and horns sound in the mists around them*

Zoltar: *looks at Goldberry* How long after we are overdue can we expect a rescue? Seventeen days? I dont want to rain on your parade, but we aint gonna last 17 turns! Game over, why dont we put her in charge! *points at the Beercart Pony*

Goldberry: Hey, Zoltar... just deal with it because we need you! And I'm sick of your bullshit. I need to see air ducts. I need to see electrical access tunnels, sub-basements, every possible way into this complex. Two teams, stay frosty! Defend the Bullywug King! Defend the Beer Cart!

All heroes and their henchmen: *saluting and standing to attention* Ah-ffirmative!

THE BATTLE FOR ZIRAKZIGIL

Summary
The White Council in Gondor has discovered that a secret beacon exists high above Khazad Dum, upon the peak of Zirakzigil! They have sent Goldberry and her team to investigate this beacon. The White Council also sends 2 new types of henchmen to support our heroes - Spearmen and Handgunners. Once the expedition nears the peak, they meet the fabled Bullywug King. He needs our heroes help him light the Beacon of Zirakzigil. The Bullywug King sees Butters the Beer Cart Pony and says their salvation lies with the Beer Cart! If the Beer Cart is taken to the nearby Occulum, they can power up the Beacon with beer as a fuel source. With that done, the Bullywug King can send an amplified summons for help to otherworldly allies. Suddenly, bestial roars and horns sound in the mists around them. The Bullywug King must stay near the Beacon to cast his spell, while the Beer Cart and its defenders must reach the Occulum. Defend the Bullywug King! Defend the Beer Cart!

Board Setup
The table size is 22" x 60" (two mats). Place the Occulum within 6" of the eastern board edge, then place 4 clumps of terrain - trees, rocks, or ruin around it. Then place some Stone Platforms, 4 lanterns, and the Beacon in the center within 12" of the western board edge. Also place 2 clumps of trees, rocks, or ruins around it. Clump terrain needs at least 4" of open space around them and at least 2" from a board edge.

Deployment
- All Heroes, Henchmen, the Beercart and the Bullywug King must deploy within 12" of the eastern edge. See Hero Stat sheets for points buying Henchmen forces.
- No Villains are deployed at start.

Reinforcements:
- DM Only Info

Special Rules
- Addendum to Ranged combat
- Ranged combat needs LOS, friendlies will block LOS, may still fire into combat between friendlies and enemies
- Most Ranged figures cannot Move and Fire (except for Hobbit slingers)

Victory Conditions
- Game ends for a Hero Major Victory once:
The Slann Mage AND the Beer Cart (or a Barrel of Beer) are on the Numinous Occulum.
If the Beer Cart is destroyed, any 2 friendly figures can drag the Beer Barrel for a move of 4" per turn (1 figure drags 2"), but these figures must forego Shooting, Casting, or Melee Attacks.
- Game ends for a Villain Victory once either the Bullywug King is slain or Turn 12 and the Hero victory conditions are not achieved.

The Numinous Occulum and the "dark crystal" on the second level.

The hero starting defense. Who stays with the Bullywug King and who will accompany the Beercart?

On one side, Zoltar, Bortai, Bulldog, Verbal, Kano, and Stroika look to advance to the Occulum or stay at the Beacon.

On the other side, Goldberry, Alpha, Xanthia, the Beercart, and the Hobbit militia seem ready to set out for the Occulum and perhaps eternal glory or shameful defeat.

Sir Solaire commands the Handgunners and Myrmidon Spearmen to defend the Beacon and the Bullywug King.

Sir Solaire: Live your best life, my friends. May the power of the eternal and unconquered Sun watch over all of you!

Zoltar: *looks at Bortai* What is it? What do you see? What do you sense?

Bortai: Evil. From the darkest corners of Old Night. They come! Prepare yourselves!

Zoltar: She knows of what she speaks. Bortai once walked in the streets of the Nameless City and survived to tell of it. I hope we all live to tell of this upcoming tale...

A Gug! A Gug has come! What a terrifying and gruesome visage to look upon!


Next Post: The Battle continues...